Cogito Ergo Sum

Something to know about me.
I write more than I sketch.
When I brainstorm, I brainstorm in words and writing it out rather than drawing it out. I'll write out what I want it to look like, use adjective, etc...
So when I am particularly frustrated, I write...a lot.
Here is an excerpt from my quarter-life identity crisis:

"I think I lucked out when I picked graphic design as my path. It didn’t require too much thinking on my part really. I’ve always loved being creative. I did just about everything a creative person could do. I painted, I sketched, I sang, I danced, I wrote, I photographed, I played musical instruments, etc…I just picked graphic design because I figured it combined as many creative activities that I enjoyed. It was either OCAD for graphic design or U of T for creative writing so I applied and I decided that if I didn’t get into OCAD that I wasn’t good enough to pursue design. Either way, I was still going to be doing both years down the line, and I am. The choice did not require much self-reflection or introspection on my part. It was clear the general topics that I enjoyed because it came easier to me and it was something I loved to do. Sure, I could do math and science and I got respectable marks but I wasn’t particularly interested in doing it. Pursuing the arts was a natural path so I didn’t go through the whole angsty who am I and who do I want to be experience. And now I am. Stupid identity crisis.
........."

"..........I am a passionate person. My whole life is about passion. It’s always been about doing what I love. I never once contemplated following a life path where what I loved to do was not dominant. I do what I love and I’m good at it because I love it (or at least I like to think I'm good at it). I’m curious and adaptable so this combined with passion makes me really intense when I really want/care about something. When I do something, I throw myself into it with enthusiasm and single-minded determinedness. I strongly believe that when you do something, you should do it the best you can, otherwise, what’s the point of doing it. I’m very emotionally volatile so when I experience an emotion, I really feel it and I become consumed by it and ergo, express it, whether through my art, words or in any way I can. This is the reason I do what I do, because through my various creative outlets, I can communicate what I feel and think; I can share who I am and understand who I am based on what I produce. Our actions define us. What I do, defines me. Creativity allows me to understand who I am.

Huh. Isn’t that a kicker.
I seriously didn’t understand completely the full depth of why I do the things I do (like photography, design and writing) until I wrote it out and in this act have proved my point."



Sorry if the conclusion seemed very predictable and obvious to those of you who have yourselves all figured out, but it was quite the revelation to me and I feel better that was the point of the entry.